some of you are in our daily lives, some of you are continents and oceans away. some of you are loved ones of loved ones and may never have met us face to face. but if you're here to read about zanna, then what follows is a humble and heartfelt request intended for you.
nearly 10 years ago ama and i set out on the path that led us to zanna. after 8 years of struggling against and grieving our infertility, i woke on march 25, 2005 with a clear heart and a revelation. the understanding that our child would be born in china was bestowed on me in a dream. 2 years ago today we received word from adoption officials in china that they honored our petition, and matched us with fu ni cheng. she was 9 months old and living in an orphanage at the time. i am protective of the small details of zanna's story, they are hers to hold or share as she one day will. but i will paint the picture here in broad strokes, because this is the story of every child adopted from china. this is a story that you should know.
most chinese families are legally forbidden to have more than one child. thousands of years of tradition and plain-faced economic reality demand that families have sons. for the vast majority of chinese, disregarding the law, tradition, or economic reality would mean total ruin. these are precious few words to sum up an enormously complicated situation, but i mean for this to be a letter and not a book. if you're interested in exploring the subject more deeply, i urge you to start by reading
wanting a daughter needing a son by kay ann johnson. i'd be happy to suggest a dozen other books if you contact me directly.
where was i? one child per family. families need sons. there are also laws forbidding doctors to reveal the sex of unborn babies to discourage the use of abortion as a sex selection method. so of course, roughly half of babies born in china are girls, and many new parents are devastated. people are people, and i know beyond the shadow of a doubt that hearts break when families decide that they cannot raise their daughters. add to this scenario that placing a child for adoption is illegal in china. however at odds with reality it seems, the chinese government wants each family to give birth to a single child, raise him or her, and be complete. when poor families give birth to daughters they cannot raise, there is no legal way to safely place them with anyone. so what happens?
all over china, everyday, infants are abandoned. most often in the early morning, babies are discovered in baskets and boxes by people on the street. in markets, at crossroads, and on the steps of government buildings, baby-sized bundles are tragically common. with very rare exceptions, every child adopted from china knows only this much about her beginning.
though zanna came into the care of her orphanage as a newborn and joined our family at 11 months old, she is shockingly clear about what came before. at 19 months she was acting out scenes from her infancy, desperate to share what she remembered. by 22 months she was regularly asking to return to china. daily for nearly the last year, zanna has packed a bag and gathered dolls and musical instruments, and set out on the path to china. at times we are invited. at times she travels alone. but always, she sits on the steps by the door imagining the airplane around her and dreaming of what she'll do when she arrives. i ask her every time,
"what will you do when you get there, my love?"
"visit my friends"
"play music"
"eat"
"see my people. go home."
we learned last month that zanna's orphanage is hosting a celebration next july. they've invited all of the children who've called that place home to return for a reunion. while we always knew we'd return to china with zanna someday for a "heritage tour," we imagined we'd travel when she was 8 or 9. we expected at least to have the adoption paid off by then!
zanna's insitance coupled with this invitation compels us. again with a clear heart and a revelation, we understand that we must go to china. not when she's 8 or 9, but next july. the cost is enormous and the timing unexpected. in about 8 months we need to raise about $10,000. several compassionate and brilliant friends have persuaded me to share publicly some of what i have shared with them. we must walk with zanna on this path, and we need all kinds of help to do it. for now, these are things we need:
- donations of money. we have established an account in zanna's name. if you are inspired to contribute to this account as a christmas gift or for her birthday (january 31st), your gift will go directly toward the purchase of transportation, hotel rooms, food and guides in china. any donated money beyond what the trip requires will be held in zanna's college fund.
- donation of frequent flyer miles. i'm currently researching this, but your unused miles in combination with others might mean a free plane ticket for us ($1500 reduction in our total travel cost!).
- local friends and family can donate to the mother of all garage sales in the spring. we plan to make a weekend of unloading all the useful things we and our friends no longer need. far flung friends might just get in the spirit and host sattelite garage sales or clean out their attics via ebay and donate the spoils.
- local friends and family can help us out with house sitting when we're away. we plan to be gone for 2 weeks, and the cats are no help with the turtle, who is in turn, no help with the plants.
- share this blog with anyone you think you should.
- send us your prayers and loving thoughts. raising big money is a concrete challenge. taking our baby girl back to the place that calls her is another thing entirely. we'll need strength, healing, patience, forgiveness, and i can't imagine what else.
if you are moved to help us make this journey, please sign up as a follower of the blog, or bookmark it and return often. if the support you can offer us is bearing witness, we will benefit from your generosity of spirit. i will journal here about our progress and with developments about the support we need. when the time comes, this site will be our travel journal too.
thank you for reading. we are so blessed.
jojo
yeah, the baby girl's got money in the bank! i thought y'all might enjoy the documentation of opening her first account. she was way excited about being asked to sit at the table and fill out forms. she proudly carried around proof of her account until naptime.
